My Red Tail

hi bloggers and readers... it's been quite awhile... well, i really miss blogging. I'm so busy that when i get home from work, i go to bed and sleep. I'm thinking of writing a new blog about my love life, but i don't think it's really something that would interest all of you. I'm just so depressed that I can't tell anybody about what's going on in my life. I'm tired to keep what's inside of me, like i wanna shout and tell the world that I'm hurting. Although i know the fact that this pain will not stay forever, I'm still worried and I'm sad that this is happening to me. I used to be very happy and satisfied with my loved one, until distance separated us for quite some time. I trusted, I believed. Later on, i knew it wasn't worth it at all. Even if there was an apology, I couldn't let the pain go. It's been 5 months since it happened and here I am, stuck with the pain in my heart. I have no idea how to move on. I'm still with this person I love so much. Is it real that you can love someone even if the trust has disappeared? I used to say that trust is more important than love. Now, I can't say goodbye though I don't trust this person completely anymore. I know I have to let go but there is something that holds me back. The pain goes on and on everyday, and i feel so helpless as day goes by. I don't know what to do, I'm confused. I hope that soon, I'll find a way to accept the mistakes and learn to forgive and just forget. I wish it's possible. I wish it's so easy to move on.

Oh my God! It's been a long time since I last wrote something here. I've been busy since September. I told you guys that I'm heading to Qatar and when I got here in Doha, I worked and worked and worked...

I have no PC here in Qatar before; I used to borrow someone else's laptop. I can't blog because I have not much time to do so. Of course, shy to borrow her laptop for hours. Finally, I bought my laptop last Thursday, so here I am now. I hope back for good. I'm really busy at work. "Too much work" as what my Lebanese co-worker says all the time. Sometimes, I sit back and think what if I go back home in the Philippines. I know I won't get the job that I really like but at least I'm with my family, right? Homesickness slowly kills me. And I can't accept the fact that there is also discrimination here in Qatar. I'm a Filipino who works with arab peeps. And to my dismay, my boss thinks about money, money, and money. He even makes us go to work even on our rest day. Fridays are supposed to be our day off and yet, he gets our friday evenings to work for his studio.. You know, we even have work on Christmas day. It upsets me that he has no respect on Christian holidays. Why he didn't give us a week to spend our Christmas season? We worked hard during Garangao and Eid last September and October. We worked more or less 16 hours in one day! We worked whole day on fridays too. Isn't that too much? What is more upsetting is that Filipino salary is just half of what other nationalities in our studio get. And about workload, ours is more than those peeps. Damn it! I always think about leaving that studio but where will I go once I left it? Patience is virtue as we always say, but how long must I be patient? Oh well, I guess I have to accept the fact that this world is really unfair. I'll just make my own world where there is only love, peace and justice.

Are you familiar with this? Sunday at home is known as "Sin Day" which means, eating anything you want to eat just to make you happy, but strictly within 24 hours only! Yup, this is being followed at home since we are all overweight. My brother who goes to the gym regularly told us about this one very helpful thing to make us lose weight. Eat right from Monday til Saturday, then eat everything you are craving for on Sundays only. I think following this routine helped us lose weight somehow plus drinking water before meals NOT after meals...

I love it when it is Sunday... I ate grilled pork chops with a cup of rice for lunch, I had pizza for my 4:00 pm snacks, I had coke too, and I had lasagna for dinner... MMMMM... so yummy!!! Tomorrow is Monday and I'll be back eating 1/4 cup of rice with a small piece of meat for lunch and dinner, and just crackers in between meals. No softdrinks (which makes me sad), and no sweets (which makes my days like a nightmare!)

Oh well, don't you simply love "Sin Days"?!
I bet you do now.

I bought new stuffs for my travel and I spent only a few bucks to get all what I need!

Yep, that's true, only a few bucks for everything I need to bring along with me.

Greenhills Shopping Center (GSC) is one of the best place to shop for anything you want, like clothes and shoes (Yes girls, you hear me?), all of what's new can be bought here, and all at a cheap price.

To be exact, I brought 6,000 pesos (more or less $130) yesterday, and I bought 4 black shirts, 2 black slacks, 1 black skinny jeans, a pair of black peep-toe shoes, and 3 colored bras for my friend... I counted my money when I got home and found out I spent 2,360 pesos (more or less $52) only! Imagine that? I still have 3,640 pesos ($80) to buy more of the things that I want.

If you love bargains, shop at GSC now! It's in San Juan, MM, Philippines

It's been like four years since my last post and log in at my multiply.com account. I totally forgot all about it. I'm more on friendster and piczo so I lost my interest at multiply. My friends are also at friendster only so I decided to abandon my account... Now, since I'm active in blogging, I'm trying to use it for that purpose. Also, I want to use it for business. I might try to sell some stuffs using my multiply page. How bout you? Do you have a multiply account too? maybe you want to check out mine and add me up.. HERE is the link... leave some comments! thanks!

do u ever feel like you have an unfinished business with someone you've met ages ago? like u want to meet that person again for a chat or u want to clear some things up with him?

its been 10 years when i met this guy from the place i used to work at. I was a front counter crew in a fast food restaurant, and this guy used to line up to my counter. I can say he was our regular customer. He was always having breakfast meals and after his classes, he would drop by for some snacks. On weekends, he and his friends would drop by after their basketball practice. One night, the place was tightly packed. All counters were full, I was in a rush. When it was his turn to order, he asked me if i can be his prom date... i stopped for a few seconds, shocked, then i said "Why me? No... I'm sorry, but really, NO."

After that, he never ordered on my counter anymore. If he had no choice, he would let his friends order for him. I felt he was upset, disappointed, and he hates me. I wasn't able to explain. I know i was able to hurt him, but i had no chance to make him feel better.

I want to let him know why i refused. I had a boyfriend back then, I'm older than him, and I'm just a service crew, while he could be a rich kid just playing a game. I was afraid that maybe he was not serious at all. It's been 10 years, I don't know where he is. I don't know if he still remembers that incident. The store where it all happened is already closed. We cant go back, hoping to bump at each other again.

How bout u? Is there any unfinished business in your life right now?

In everyone's love life, we don't know what's going to happen in a relationship. We might meet two different people who can change our lives instantly. Also, we might face the most difficult question there is. Now, if worse comes to worst, who are you going to choose to be with, the one you love or the one who loves you?

I don't want to make a decision like this in my life, it scares me. I don't want to choose coz I might end up choosing the wrong one. Sadly, we can't turn back time once we have made a decision already. This is also the same as choosing your head over heart... Well, if I really have to, I will choose the one who loves me because I know that the right time will come when i will be able to learn to love him back... Actually, the decision varies from one person to another. For me, I know myself so much and I know that it's easier teaching myself to love someone than teaching someone to love me the way I want him to. If I will choose to follow my heart, I might end up hurting deeply if I will continue loving someone who doesn't even feel anything for me. I believe that this is also the reason why God put our head above our heart.

I'm one of those people who wants to go and work abroad not for a higher salary (which it is if compared here in the Philippines) but because I want to travel and see places. I love to explore every corners in every land that my feet could take me. I don't want to lose the chance not to be able to see and know what makes other countries beautiful. If there is one job I would choose, I want to be a seawoman in a cruise ship. It doesn't matter whatever position God will give me there, but at least I'm part of that cruise and I'll be able to almost go around the world in less than a year. Now, I'm packing my things while waiting for my authenticated Qatar visa that might come anytime next week... My friends who are waiting for me in Qatar to work with too, told me that our employer booked me already and that I might receive the round trip ticket anytime too. OMG! I'm so excited! I've been to UAE two years ago, now, I'll be back in the middle east again. I know it's going to be a burning oven, so I should not forget my sunblock and whitening lotion (actually, these are on top of my "what-to-bring" list)... I guess I'll be leaving my new born niece behind, my pets, my room, my HP books... but I have to think of my future. I can't stay here trying to earn online all the time. I have to break some bones to get cash faster and I can't see with my own eyes the places the world has to show me if I would just sit here all day in front of my pc right? Oh well, I'm just counting days, see you soon Qatar!

Well, it's been a month since I started blogging and I don't know if I'm making money on Adsense or Payperpost.com at all.. It's stupid to blog when you are after the money and write everyday so you'll earn a lot from it, but still, you don't get anything in return. I think I'm going to stop blogging for this purpose. I would just write and write since it's my passion. Although, I'm not going to deny the fact that somewhere between the lines, I'm still hoping to earn from it. You see, it's not easy to log in all the time just to blog because I'm sure we have a lot of other things to do. I'm thinking of a program online that will make us all earn just by reading blogs and reviewing it. This is a lot easier than clicking ads which have viruses attached on it. With the program I'm thinking of, we will earn a dollar every 10 blogs we review, or something like that... Is there a program like that already? If there is, please inform me. I'm not a web programmer at all. I don't even have the money to start that business, nor the money to pay blog reviewers world wide. Maybe, when I get the chance I will help blog hoppers out there to earn in the easiest way. For now, I would just rely on people clicking on my Adsense boxes. And I hope that there will be a lot of advertisers willing to pay Asians to blog about their products on Payperpost.com....... Oh did I mention that we earn on Adsense thru clicking ads? I guess it's about to tell all of you that blog hopping won't make us earn, it's clicking the ads on every blogsites we visit that will make us gain dollars. So let me just remind you guys that everytime you "blog-hop", make sure you click on their ads, and leave comments on their pages. That way, they will know you clicked on their ads, and you must do the same way to theirs. Got it? Alright, happy blogging! And blog safely dears.... kisses!!! xxx

Last Monday, August 25, 2008, at exactly 2:20 in the morning, my sister gave birth to my first niece! I'm so happy that finally I'll be seeing her who I patiently waited for 9 months. My sister was brought to the hospital 1:00 pm of August 24th, but then she was having hard time laboring so her doctor decided to have her delivery on the CS way. They started the operation 1:30 early morning of August 25th, then despite of the noise coming from my mom and our guests, I heard my niece's first cry. A few minutes later, I saw her at the nursery room. Miyu, as what her dad named her, looked like her mom. It was funny that her dad was claiming she looks like him. Well, I didn't argue with him anymore. Fine, it's his day anyway.

It was nine in the morning when I had time to sleep. After an hour and a half, mom woke me up and said that the nursery is open for viewing. "What?", i asked. I saw her a few hours ago, I haven't slept for almost a day. Oh well, I waited for her for nine months, so a few minutes to visit her is worth it for sure. To my dismay, she didn't look like her mom anymore. She is now a photocopy of her dad, OMG, I don't want her to have his dad's little eyes! Is it true that babies looks at birth change that fast?

Nevermind, at least my niece is healthy, right? I hope she will grow up to be a good girl who loves to study and read books, than going out with friends and come home late at night, or worst, going to the casino and play poker like her "spending-one-million-pesos-in-one-night-at-the-casino" father... (Grrrrr!!!)

If you are rich and can make a movie, what would it be about and who would you want to work with you?

As a frustrated movie writer, I have a lot of stories stuck in my mind that I still hope will be on big screen someday. But if I were rich and can pay anyone to work with me, i would like Tom Cruise and Katie, Brad and Angelina, Will Smith and Jada, Elijah Wood, Daniel Radcliffe, Orlando Bloom, Keira Knightley, Tom Hanks, and Kirsten Dunst to work for my movie....

Now here's the story:

How about transferring a few families to live on Mars to find out if it is a place like earth? and then there will be food, water, new built houses for these few chosen families.... Later on, they will encounter aliens who will try to kill them one by one... or find out there are also aliens who could be our friends. I prefer making it a scary movie, so I'll choose the first one.

The families are being monitored live via satellite. The scientists watch them 24/7... But just when the aliens started to attack them, the cams went off. So they lost contact from earth. Now, will they survive or not? Will it be too late to rescue them?

People are conducting researches about other planets. But I hope trying to live on someone else's territory is a big NO for everyone. This movie will teach us how to respect the lives and privacy of others (aliens, that's how we call them)...

Hmmm, I wish Warner Brothers can read this and pay me for my great idea.

Once i went to a friend's house along with our 3 other friends, greeted her mom and sister "good evening" as well as her grandfather and grandmother standing behind them. A few minutes after, her mom and sister left for a party.

Dinner time came, the five of us sat on the dining table, then I asked my friend, "why not call your grandparents to join us eat tonight?" She said, "I don't have grandparents, it's only us who are here."

Someone asked from myLot (an online discussion/blog site) this question, "Is it normal to be single or not?" She said that she's 40 years old, got married and divorced, been into relationships and now, she chose to be single. Her friends think that it's a sad thing. So she asked myLotters (people from the discussion/blog site) about what we think about it.

Well, I said, it is normal. People tend to choose to be alone somehow. Being sick and tired in a relationship could be the main reason for that. Well, I used to be single for 3 years straight, and it's because i enjoy to be on my own than having someone to be with and think about everyday. Sometimes it's better to be single than having a boyfriend who is never really "in love" with you, right? How about you? What do you think about it?

If you have seen the movie A Walk to Remember with Mandy Moore and Shane West, I'm sure you can relate to this. I'm such a fan of this film and I've seen it a lot of times and cried with it over and over.

So what is the story about?

Landon (Shane West) is popular guy in school, one of the hottest for sure. He's into fun all the time, living the life of a typical student. Jamie (Mandy Moore) is the conservative/naive type of person who always gets good marks in class, serious in everything she does, a very loving daughter, obedient, simple-looking, and her faith makes her beautiful inside. Well, they had to work together in their drama class, Jamie helping him with his lines. Landon's friends including him, make fun of her at her back. Later, the two fell accidentally in love with each other... Landon chose her between his friends, then later on, finds out, Jamie is sick and dying. Now, he tries to save her and be part of her forever.

Well, Jamie Sullivan (Mandy Moore) wrote a list of the things she want to do before she dies... I made a list for myself too. Life is short, before we know it, we're almost dying. I think it would be nice to start doing the things we want to do before we pass away. It's better to be prepared than regretting things we haven't done in the end. One of my 100 things to do before i die is to be able to share my thoughts to people around the world. Isn't this "blogging" thing good enough for me? Hey, I've been sharing my mind to people out there! How about you? What are the things you want to do before you die? Let me know, let's go through this journey together.

Oh well, heard of that? Warner Brothers changed the release date of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince on theaters.. Read more on my HP blog page >> Chong Chang's Corner

Here is my second cream cake! This one tastes so good too...

I forgot to take a picture of it to show the world what I did. I wanted to taste it so soon that when it was done, my family ate it all! And all we said was "it's so yummy!" So I decided to make one again. I'm planning to make a new cream cake next week.

Mocha Truffles Cake

We need 500 ml. of all-purpose cream, half cup of condensed milk, a tbsp. of instant coffee mixed with a tbsp. of hot water, graham crackers, and chocolate truffles. Combine the cream, milk, and coffee mixture in a bowl. Lay the crackers on a plastic/ aluminum container then pour half of the cream mixture on top of it. Make a new layer of graham crackers then put the rest of the cream on top. Add shaved chocolate truffles on top. Now, chill it for 2 hours or more in the refrigerator before serving.

There you have it. Try it coz it's really so yummy!

Have you tried making a "no baking needed" cake? Well, the first one I did was two years ago. I don't really have much time to make one though it is really easy. It will only take us 15 minutes to do the mixing part and 2 hours to chill it in the refrigerator. See, no baking needed! That's so easy and real inexpensive, right? Want to know how to make my Choco Mallows Cake? Here it is:

Choco Mallows Cake

We need 500 ml. of all-purpose cream that is available in the market, half cup of condensed milk, a tbsp. of margarine, marshmallows, and chocolate cookies of your choice. Well, I prefer Oreo. Now, combine the first 3 ingredients I mentioned to make the cream mixture. Get a container, aluminum or plastic, put half of the Oreo cookies (crushed) at the first layer, covering the whole bottom. Then put half of the cream mixture on top of it, that is the second layer. The third layer will be the rest of the crushed Oreo's. Make sure that you cover the whole cream. Then, add the other half of the cream mixture. The top layer will be the marshmallows. That's it! Then chill it on the ref. for 2 hours before serving... The longer you chill it, the better it is.

Hi there... been having headaches lately so it's only now I've updated my red-tail page. Also, to update you guys, there's this new blog page I'm having so much fun with so check it out here. It's my Harry Potter Blog Page! Well, I've found out that it's really nice to write about something you really love talking about. Some might find me crazy coz at my age, I'm still hooked up with Harry Potter but you gotta know that there are more peeps out there who are older than me and still hooked up just the same. Oh well, anyway, so if you are just as crazy as me, check out my third blog page. And it would be nice of you to leave a message. Thanks! xxx

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